ONE LOCAL Fine Gael voter has confirmed that if it was a Sinn Féin TD leaking confidential documents while in government the resultant earthquake of apoplectic rage would have registered a 9.5 on the Richter scale, its tremors felt for miles around.
“Oh lol too right, I’d be fucking raging. I can just imagine myself now ‘an affront to democracy’, ‘any public representative doing such a thing brings shame upon the office’, ‘politics aside, this is a deeply distressing scandal which counts among the most worrying in the state’s history’. Ah stop, I’d be livid it’d disgust on a personal level to my core,” admitted good natured and cheery Fine Gael supporter Richard Hetty.
“But sure thank God that’s not the case – it’s not a grubby little IRA-er sharing confidential documents, which I presume is certainly illegal, but instead it’s a reliable, can-trust-with-your-life-and-tax-bracket, honest-to-God normal decent bloke aka a Fine Gael TD so it’s just a storm in a tea cup” offered Hetty.
Barely able to contain his laughter at the imagined thoughts of if the roles were reversed and he was cheering on Fine Gael TDs and Senators as they took to media outlets to call for inquiries and resignations, Hetty couldn’t help but get a kick out of how self aware he was of his double standards.
“At least with the FG lot, you can rely on any leaks going to captains of industry, y’know decent lads who went to the right schools. Could you imagine Sinn Féin leaking confidential documents to Paddy McPipe Bomb or Barra O’Balaclava, no thank you. What a joke of a party,” added Hetty, thankful of the steady and sensible hand Fine Gael continue to provide in government.