“THE WIFE, the kids, work, bills, life’s pressures, they just don’t exist in that moment,” explains John Malley, a brave man willing to share his truth with WWN.
Taking a slash in the middle of nowhere is a time honoured tradition in Ireland, but maybe now for the first time since its inception people are talking about what it means to them and how underappreciated and taken for granted it is in Ireland.
“Imagine trying to take a slash in public in peace in the likes of Manhattan, good luck to ya. This is why we’ve got to treasure out wide open and deserted places,” offer Malley, who doesn’t know where he’d be without a piddle in the middle of nowhere.
“I dunno, it just feels like I’m getting rid of the weight of the world that’s on my shoulders by pissing it out my mickey,” added Malley, who was partial to also dropping his pants all the way down to his ankles if he was struck by the urge.
“The way the gentle breeze wind tickles my testicles… it’s magical.”
“Sometimes I tell the missus I’ve to pop to the office because I forgot something, but really, I just drive for miles into the middle of nowhere and just… piss” Malley said, who also admitted to sometimes feeling guilty about his secret.
“Some people go to the gym, some get therapy, but me? I chug down on 3 litres of water and hit the open road to fill my boots by emptying my bladder creating my own private flood plain. I know the wife needs a break now and again, but this is my own private paradise,” Malley concluded, as the fart he ripped toward the end of urinating echoed across an empty valley.