“Okay, The Government Needs To Cancel The Leaving Cert ASAP As I Haven’t Done A Fucking Tap”

IN AN exclusive interview, Waterford student Daniel Carey shared his experience of foolishly expecting the Department of Education to abandon plans on staging in-person exams during an academic year full of disruption and an ongoing global pandemic.

“Funny story, so I didn’t bother studying, and now I’m kind of worried I’ll actually have to sit these superspreader exams,” shared Carey, who has continuously thought continuous assessment could save the day.

Carey, a normally diligent student with consistent results in school has been left adrift by the constant uncertainty around the feasibility and safety of placing 56,000 students into poorly ventilated room during a pandemic with emerging, more transmissible variants.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed Norma, but the auld pandemic isn’t the optimum backdrop to The Most Important Exams Of Your Life™,” added Carey directly addressing the Minister for Education.

“And okay the whole ‘we will be having the Leaving Cert even if flesh eating zombies are gnawing at your flesh’ was funny at first, but really I started to bank on the fact you lot would pull the plug on exams, much like I pulled the plug on studying for anything. You can continuously asses this if you think I’m sitting exams,” said Carey aiming a middle finger in the direction of the government.

With uncertainty and contradictory communications from those in charge set to continue before a u-turn on a previous u-turn is announced Carey has been left with no option but to commnunicate exclusively in ‘fuck my life’ themed memes from here on in.

Waterford Whispers News