satire

Local Loser Really Into Helping Out Around The Community

A LOCAL WATERFORD based loser has no idea how stupid he appears to other people as he continues to display a predisposition to offering a helping hand to all and sundry in his community. Matt Harty, is often seen going for walks armed with a plastic bag so he can pick up litter, as well… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Media Running Out Of Ways To Say ‘Health System Fucked’

LEAFING through dog eared copies of thesauruses reporters are struggling to remember how many times they have used ‘catastrophic’, ‘cataclysmic’, ‘grim’, ‘decimated’, ‘disaster’ and ‘the bit in Titanic when the ship snaps in half’ to describe the recent deterioration in the capacity of the health service to treat an explosion in the number of Covid-19… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Things To Get Offended About

SOMEONE WITHIN government or the civil service leaking details of the Mother & Baby Homes report to newspapers. The Sunday Independent publishing it. Meaning this is how survivors first learned details from the report including that 9,000 children died in mother and baby homes. The human trafficking of children by the church. For profit. The… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Covid Numbers Even Starting To Concern Hardy Bastards

IRELAND’S coronavirus crisis has reached the point where even the hardest of chaws are having second thoughts about walking into a supermarket without a mask, a worrying new report has shown. Whereas tough nuts and hard bastards saw ‘no problems’ with flaunting regulations during the 2020 phase of the pandemic, worryingly high new daily figures… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Has Dublin Lost Its Soul? Iveagh Markets Not Being Turned Into Hotel

A CRISIS is emerging in Dublin following the soul destroying news that the derelict Iveagh Markets site in The Liberties will not be turned into a hotel, and instead could be restored to its original form after being repossessed by Lord Iveagh. Decried as a ‘cancer eating away at Dublin’s soul’, many worried developers have… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Local Man Going To Miss Covid-19 All The Same

WITH the rollout of a Covid-19 vaccine almost imminent, local man Warren Twomey has taken stock of just what an unforgettable year 2020 has been, already growing nostalgic at the thought of saying goodbye to Covid-19. “Ah you’d miss it all the same, this Covid stuff. Do you know how many times I’ve had to… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Christmas Shopping In A Pandemic, A Guide

THE CHRISTMAS shop rush on the high street and in towns will be a little different this year and WWN is on hand to deliver an essential guide to getting the Christmas shopping done in a pandemic: Train with deep sea divers on how to hold your breath for long periods of time before taking… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


Bitter Gardaí Bust Shebeen After Not Receiving Invite

WATERFORD Gardaí have vowed to clamp down on one of the most dangerous operations known to man, stating they are absolutely disgusted with the nation, WWN has learned. “The fact that people we know and protect could go out of their way to build fully functional home bars with pool tables, dart boards, widescreen TVs,… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


‘Ireland AM’ Found To Be Squatting & Filming In Dublin Home For Years

AN IRATE Irish man, returning to his home after several years living in Australia was said to be shocked and angered to discover Virgin Media’s flagship morning show Ireland AM has been claiming squatters rights and filming their show in his home. Simon McCormack (41) tried to gain entry into his home, which he believed… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…


‘The Lads’ WhatsApp Awful Quiet Recently For Some Reason

ACTIVITY on certain lads’ WhatsApp group chats have grown eerily quiet in the last week but it is believed to be completely unconnected to reports that the gardaí are investigating the circulation of images of Irish women and underage girls. Some groups have recorded as much as a 100% drop in activity, although this development… Read more » Waterford Whispers News…